Wednesday, December 4, 2013

{finding the beauty in chaos}

life has been crazy and full of chaos to say the least. we are still trying to get into the groove of being a family of five. and just when I think we've got it down, everything breaks down into chaos.
Now if you know me, you would know that I do not do well in chaos. in fact, if chaos was walking down the street I would turn and run the other way. Well these past few months I've been forced to face chaos head on. And I must admit, I ran or tried too at least. There have been fountains of tears, throwing up my hands and asking God "Why?"
I was letting the chaos and busyness of everyday life overtake and overwhelm me. I was losing my focus. I was focusing on everything that was falling apart around me instead of focus on the little victories that were popping up here and there. One particular day, I was knee deep in the trenches of defeat. I was racing around trying to get dressed while bouncing around a cranky. I threw on some clothes--a simple t-shirt and jeans, but a definite step up from the yoga pant streak I had been on the previous four days. My hair was a mess. I had my glasses on. I had dark rings around my eyes from being to too tired to wash the make up off my face the night before. I walked into my daughter's room to get her dressed when she looked up at me and told said "You look pretty, Mommy. I like your pants." I kneeled down, and enveloped my little girl in my arms. I felt my eyes flood with tears as I looked into her sweet little face. She saw what I couldn't see. All I saw was the mountains of laundry, the sink full of dirty dishes and worn out , tired reflection in the mirror. She saw my beauty in the midst of all the chaos.
She opened my eyes to the bits of beauty around me...she taught me how to find the beauty in all the chaos that may surround me.

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